THIS IS WHAT LOVE IS

We cannot properly speak of the ministry of reconciliation without first experiencing the very deep and profound ache of separation and the ruthless brutality of life apart from the love of God.

Once we truly know the overwhelming despair of being so separated from the Father, then we might begin to understand how a word of condemnation from our lips could never, in any way, be confused with the kind of self-giving agape love that Jesus calls us to demonstrate to people who have never experienced it as we have.

"Love one another as I have loved you." - Jesus

This means that our mission is to love people sincerely, and from the heart.[1 Peter 1:22]

We have to stop first and ask: "How has Jesus loved me?"

And then we take from that list and find ways to duplicate that kind of self-sacrificing, others-focused love to people who need it the most.

How do you know if you're loving people the way Jesus commanded?

Simple: If they feel loved, then you're doing it right. 

If they don't feel loved by you, then you're doing it wrong.

No Christian should ever cause anyone to doubt that God loves them.

And that love has to start with us.

"Go and do likewise." - Jesus

-kg

How Selective Tolerance Leads To More Violence

The tug-of-war with Christians who are committed to making lists of all the ways that Islam is wrong and Christianity is right continues.

After my previous posts about how Christians are too "right" for their own good, I received even more comments about - you guessed it - how wrong Islam is and how right Christianity is.

[sigh]

And on and on it goes.

Are Christians really unable to set aside their religious differences to embrace someone of another faith?

Not exactly.

For example, most Christians I know fully embrace Judaism. They love the Jewish faith. They use Jewish terms for Jesus and Messiah ["Yeshua", "Mashiac", etc.]. They wear the Star of David proudly. They observe the Jewish Passover meal. They even pray for the peace of Israel.

But why?

The Jewish faith denies that Christ is the Messiah. They refuse to accept that Jesus is born of a virgin. They do not believe that Jesus performed miracles. They do not believe that Jesus ascended into Heaven. They do not believe that Jesus is alive today or that Jesus is returning to judge the world.

But none of that matters to most Evangelical Christians today.

They are totally capable of enthusiastically overlooking all of that for the sake of what we have in common with Judaism - which is namely the Old Testament scriptures.

Now, just imagine that the Jews DID believe all of these things. Could you imagine American Christians rejecting the Jewish people?

But they DO reject Muslims who happen to affirm all of these things about Jesus!

Islam teaches that:

- Jesus is the “Word of God”
- Jesus is the “Spirit of God”
- Jesus is “the Messiah"
- Jesus creates life
- Jesus cured a man born blind, and a man with leprosy.
- Jesus gives life to dead people.
- Jesus went to heaven.
- Jesus is still alive today.
- Jesus will come again to judge the entire world.

[See chapter 3, verses 45-55, the Qu’ran]

Can you imagine rejecting someone who believed all of these things about Jesus?

Can you imagine refusing to engage in a dialog with someone who already had such an amazing foundation of faith in Jesus?

Yet, somehow, Christians feel totally ok embracing one faith which denies all of these things about Jesus while rejecting another faith which affirms all of the same things about Him.

Does this make any sense?

Not to me it doesn't.

You have a choice. You can either:

A) Keep making lists of all the ways you are right and Muslims are wrong

OR

B) Look for how much you have in common with them about Jesus and enter into a fruitful dialog with a Muslim about Him.

One path will result in more division and violence.

The other path will result in an amazing conversation of Jesus with a Muslim and the opportunity for understanding and peace.

So...what are you most interested in here?

As long as you are only interested in seeking a path for opposition and division, you will keep on making those lists of how "wrong" they are.

But, if you are ready to start seeking a path for peace, and for reconciliation, you will take full advantage of an amazing opportunity to talk with a Muslim about Jesus.

What would a religion of peace really teach you to do here?

If you really belong to a peaceful religion, then take the path of peace: Engage in an open dialog with a Muslim about all you have in common about Jesus.

I dare you.

Shalom,
-kg

ARE WE CHRISTIANS TOO RIGHT FOR OUR OWN GOOD?

The other day I shared something on social media about the common ground we have with Muslims. Essentially, it's a very long list of things that both Christians and Muslims agree about when it comes to Jesus.

You can read the post where this common ground is outlined here>

But the response to this post was what really bothered me.

Instead of Christians affirming this common ground, or celebrating what we have in common - which is Jesus - mostly what I heard instead was a long list of what we disagree with Muslims about.

"But, they don't have the same Jesus."

"They don't believe Jesus was crucified."

"They don't believe Jesus was the Son of God."

And on and on the comments went.

Yes, I am well aware [I think we all are] that Christians and Muslims disagree on many things.

But the point is this: If we want to find a way to share with them about the Jesus we know, we have a very natural place to start that conversation.

However: If all we want to do is to prove that we are right and they are wrong, then we will continue to remain in an "Us vs Them" posture.

The irony of this is that Christians who refuse to accept what we have in common with Muslims are the ones who are also refusing to take any steps towards peace and reconciliation.

And while they are in the process of refusing to move towards peace and reconciliation, they are at the very same time arguing that is is the Muslims who are violent and uninterested in peace.

If we are truly committed to peace-making and ready to embrace the ministry of reconciliation, then we cannot continue to refuse to seek common ground for dialog about Jesus.

Please remember: Our ministry is not to prove that we are right and they are wrong.

Our mission is to love others as Christ has loved us.

As long as we make this about who is right or wrong, we will always have division.

But, if we can be mature enough to set that argument aside long enough to engage in a conversation about what we all agree on, there is hope for peace and understanding. 

Especially if what we agree on involves a conversation about Jesus.

In other words: 

If you want to see all that divides us, then that is what you will find.

If you are looking for what brings unity, then you will find plenty of that, as well.

So, what are you looking for? 

Are you looking for a fight? Then you will only think in terms of who is right and who is wrong.

Are you looking for peace? Then you will only think in terms of what you have in common and build a bridge from there.

Choose wisely.

"Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God." - Jesus [Matthew 5:9]

"Now all these things are from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation..." [2 Cor. 5:18]

-kg

**

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READ THE NEXT ARTICLE IN THIS SERIES: How Selective Tolerance Leads To More Violence

FURTHER READING: 

"A Religion of Peace?"

Be Reconciled

Paul, in the epistle of Titus urges us not to waste our time with people who like to argue. In fact he says this:

“Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned.” (Titus 3:10-11)

If you consider what the fruit of constant argumentation brings to the Body of Christ, Paul’s admonition is very practical. The point of coming together as the Body of Christ is not to entertain controversies or to argue endlessly about this doctrine or that teaching. The purpose of gathering together is to build one another up in faith. (See 1 Cor. 14:26)

Does this mean that we cannot build one another up by teaching simply because we might end up disagreeing over how to understand a scripture? Of course not. But we can allow people to disagree with us without turning the entire meeting over to this point of contention.

As an example, in our house church many of us disagree on how best to interpret various scriptures. However, we go out of our way to honor one another and to leave room for others to express their viewpoints. Understanding that either person, or both, could be wrong, everyone listens and no one attempts to sway the church in any specific direction. What’s more, we don’t make these differences our main points of discussion.

Disagreement is not divisiveness. The divisiveness comes when one person, or more, cannot let something go. It comes when those persons allow their needs and wants and agendas to become more important to them than the spiritual health and well-being of everyone else in the Body. In those cases, Paul’s words are very helpful to us:

“Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing more to do with them.”

Find your unity in Christ, not in your doctrines. Do not allow being right to rob everyone else of their right to experience Christ in the midst of the Body. As Paul also says, “Why not rather be wronged” than to allow divisions among us? (1 Corinthians 6:7)

Seek first the Kingdom, and let go of your petty arguments.

-kg

The Top 10 Things Every Christian Should Know #3

Number 3- "We Are (not) Called to Judge (unbelievers)"

My first trial by fire as a young minister of music involved a best friend's mom having an affair with an associate pastor at our church. The woman was young enough to be the pastor's daughter, and he and this woman were both married to other people, with children of their own.

As a newly ordained pastor, I was thrust into a very complicated and painful series of deacon's meetings, private conversations, and sleepless nights as I wrestled with this ugly mess. The woman was our organist on Sunday mornings, and one of my own mom’s best friends. I was the minister of music for our church and I felt it wasn't prudent for her to continue to play the organ every week with this controversy raging through our church. Our deacon board verbally assured me that they would be behind me all the way, and they were behind me...about ten feet behind me. I had to approach this woman who I had known and respected for years, and the mother of one of my best friends, and ask her to step aside until the issue could be resolved. It was the first of many painful confrontations to come in my pastoral experience.

Many people at this church took the position that we are not to judge others when it comes to situations such as this. They all quoted Jesus himself in this case who said, "Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." (Matthew 7:1-2)

If we only look at this verse of scripture alone, we can easily close the issue and conclude that we are wrong to judge others. However, Jesus has more to say on the subject than this. Later on, in the very same Gospel, Jesus also says, "If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector." (Matthew 18:15-17)

THE GOAL IS REPENTANCE
Taking both passages into account, what Jesus is saying is that, first, we are to judge fairly. In the first passage Jesus talks about how we will be judged in the same manner that we judge others. If we judge them fairly, then we will be judged that way too. If we judge with prejudice or without a sense of mercy, we will also be judged without mercy.

Additionally, Jesus forbids us from judging the eternal salvation of others here. Whatever our response to someone's actions, we are never to judge their eternal position before God. We cannot determine if someone is righteous or evil, that is for God alone to decide. This is why Jesus follows the passage in Matthew chapter 7 with the added illustration of taking the plank out of our own eye before we attempt to remove the speck from our brother’s eye. He wants us to be more concerned with our own personal righteousness and leave the inspection of others' righteousness to One more qualified.

In the second passage gives us a practical procedure for dealing with people who have hurt us or wronged us. People who are caught in adultery usually take the position that they are not hurting anyone else and the rest of us should just mind our own business and leave them alone. What they don't realize is that their infidelity is like an emotional/spiritual nuclear bomb that explodes, devastating family, friends, relationships and acquaintances for hundreds of miles in every direction. Adultery is an offense to everyone who ever knew you, loved you or trusted you. I’ve watched it decimate entire churches, families, and life-long friendships in a matter of days. With this in mind, Jesus' instructions to us in the second passage (Matthew 18:15-17) are very welcome indeed. First he asks us to go privately to the person who has wronged us. The goal is repentance. At every step, the ultimate goal is repentance. The person has to realize that they've done something that is fundamentally wrong and then they must be willing to take steps to cease the behavior, seek forgiveness and work towards healing (for themselves as well as the one's they have injured).

Paul the Apostle, in his letter to the Corinthians, also provides great clarity for us within the Church on matters of dealing with this issue:

"I have written you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people— not at all meaning the people of this world who are immoral, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters. In that case you would have to leave this world. But now I am writing you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler. With such a man do not even eat. What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? God will judge those outside. Expel the wicked man from among you." (1 Cor 5:9-13)

Here Paul clearly states that he expects that those within the Church would be discerning and would deal with those within the Body who call themselves Christians and yet continue to behave in a way that is inconsistent with someone who has truly surrendered their life to Christ.

Paul assumes that if someone behaving this way is confronted by the Church, in a loving and humble way, they will certainly repent and turn away from their sins and be restored to the fellowship. If they have not truly surrendered their lives to Jesus, then they will refuse to repent and will continue in their selfish, destructive behavior, and in that case Paul echoes Jesus (from Mathew 18) and commands that this person be removed from the fellowship and treated "as you would a pagan or a tax collector."

NOT THE EASY THING, BUT THE RIGHT THING
Many in the Church today take too lightly the idea of Church Discipline. Most of us would rather "Live and let live" than to confront another person about their ongoing sinful behavior. Many feel that to ask someone to repent of their behavior is destructive and cruel, however the truth is it's the most loving thing we can possibly do for them. If we love them, we will come to them and give them an opportunity to repent and to turn away from their destructive behaviors. It's not the easy thing to do, the right thing rarely is, but it's the most loving thing to do.

Over the last few years, I've had many opportunities to confront a brother or sister in Christ who was engaged in destructive, sinful behavior. I've always dreaded those conversations. I've never enjoyed the process at all. Many times the person's response is to run away, or to get offended, or to leave the church. Sometimes, (and I am sad to say it's rare), the person responds with tears and confession and repentance and moves forward into healing and restoration and wholeness. I wish that happened every time, but for those few times it has happened, I am very grateful.

REMEMBERING GRACE
The real test comes when that person does repent and turn away from their sin. This is the time when the Body of Christ has the opportunity to practice forgiveness and acceptance. This is where we are the ones who get to prove that we also have truly surrendered to Christ and remember the amazing grace poured out on us.

There's a passage in Paul's first letter to the churches in Corinth that I love to quote on this issue. It starts out sounding harsh, but the latter section is brilliant. It says, "Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offender's nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God."

Notice that he says, "And that is what some of you were." This is a wonderful reminder to all of us that we were all screwed up when we came to Jesus, and many of us are still screwed up as we wake up each day to follow Jesus. Paul points out that the early Church was made up of former idolaters, adulterers, male prostitutes, thieves, drunkards, swindlers and even homosexual offenders. Take that into consideration for a while. Those first groups of believers were hardly saints in their former lives. Paul wants them to stop and remember this. He wants them to recall that they were once far away from God and have no basis to wag their fingers at one of their own who falls back into that way of life.

The truth is that none of us has it figured out. None of us is yet perfect. So, when a brother or sister stumbles, we are called by God to lovingly, compassionately, confront them and offer them a chance to repent and turn away from their destructive behavior, and when they do, if they do, we are then expected to love them and embrace them and accept them as if they had never stumbled at all. One day you and I might stumble, and this is how we would want to be loved by our church family, isn't it?

Judging the unbeliever's around us is clearly out of the question for us. We are expected to love them and befriend them and serve them. We are called to demonstrate the love of Jesus in tangible ways to those who have yet to receive Christ. But within the Body, we are fully commanded to confront sinful behaviors and to remove those who do not turn away from their sin. This is also the love of Jesus.

We are called to love one another, and this means being willing to speak the truth, even if it is painful to those we love, and even to us.

"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." -Jesus (John 13:34-35)

-kg

THE MINISTRY OF RECONCILIATION

"All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation...And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation." - (2 Cor 5:18-19)


On Saturday, God worked a miracle. A son who had not spoken to his father for over 7 years got in his car, drove to a senior care center, signed his name on the register, and sat down in a chair in room 316 to talk to his dad.

His dad was dying of bone cancer. The two of them last spoke outside an all-nite diner half a decade ago. The son had been driving a delivery truck and saw an old man at the bus stop who he thought looked like his father. He pulled over. The homeless man turned out to be his dad. He gave him a few dollars, they talked for five minutes, and then the son drove away again.

The two never exchanged phone numbers. They didn't know how to get back in touch with one another again. Years went by. It seemed hopeless.

About a year ago I started visiting Robert Higgins in his motel room. He lived on the third floor, all alone. He would talk to me about that day he last saw his son. His eyes would fill with tears as he remembered his family: A son, two daughters, an ex-wife, all lost to him now.

Robert had no photographs of his wife or his children. "I'm not even sure I would know them if I saw them again," he told me. Once, a few months ago, I asked a friend to drop by and pick up Robert's laundry for him. Later on, Robert had confessed to me that when my friend walked in the door he wondered if it might possibly be his son.

We looked for Robert's son for several months. I came up empty, but another friend found a series of phone numbers online that looked promising. I called all five phone numbers and left messages. No one called back.

In the meantime, Robert ended up having surgery on his arm to remove cancerous parts of his right arm. He received a porcelain prosthetic from his right shoulder to below his elbow, beneath the skin. The cancerous bone was removed, but his arm was useless, resting limply in a black nylon sling around his neck.

Over the next several months, Robert struggled to take care of himself in the motel room. With only one arm, he was unable to shave, to open his food, to cook for himself, or to get dressed. There were a few scares due to his emphyzyma as well and he eventually agreed to relocate to a senior care center near my house.

In all this time we spoke very little about his family. It became too painful to be reminded of a son and a family that he might never get to see again.

But then one Saturday, about five months ago, my cell phone rang. It was Robert's son. He told me that there had been some "drama" in their family a few years ago and that he felt like he might be ready to talk to his dad again. He agreed to let me give Robert his cell phone number and we said goodbye.

Still, months went by with no return calls from Robert's son. I began to get frustrated. So did Robert. His hopes, which had soared with possiblity, were now once again dashed on the rocks.

After this, during our visits together, Robert began to voice disappointment about his son's silence. He wondered if he would ever see his son or hear his voice again.

Up until this point, Robert had asked me not to tell his son about the bone cancer or the hospice care. I assume it was because he wanted his son's reconciliation to be based on a genuine desire to reunite and not because of his terminal condition. As hard as it was for me, I agreed to keep Robert's secret.

But, about three weeks ago, after nothing but silence from Robert's son, I decided to write a letter. In it, I revealed everything about Robert's condition to his son. I even included a photograph taken at Robert's 78th birthday party a few months previously. As Robert's condition worsened I felt like I had no choice but to risk our friendship in order to give his son one last chance to reconcile before it was too late.

Before I could send the letter out, Robert had a change of heart. In fact, it was the day after I had already written, (but not delivered), the letter to his son. As I was getting ready to leave after one of our visits together, Robert said, "Why don't you call my son and let him know everything about the cancer." I agreed, of course, (saying nothing about the letter I had already written up), and the next day I dropped the letter off at his son's workplace.

Another two weeks went by with no response. In the meantime, I prayed. In fact, my family prayed, our house church prayed, our men's group prayed, my parents in El Paso prayed, my Facebook friends prayed, and countless others prayed for Robert's son to have a change of heart.

On Saturday that prayer was answered.

Robert called me on my cell Saturday evening after his son had gone home. "He stayed here about four hours," Robert said. "We talked a long time. We both cried together, and then we watched the baseball game on television."

When it was time for Robert's son to leave he took his father's hand and said, "Dad, I need to go now. Would you mind if I came back and visited with you again sometime?"

Robert said, "Mind? Are you kidding? Come back anytime you want and stay for as long as you want."

When I heard the news about God's grace to Robert I wept for joy. I could hardly contain myself as the tears poured out of me.

"This is an answer to my prayers, Robert," I said. "You know I've been praying for this a long, long time."

"I know you have, Keith. My son even told me to make sure I called to let you know that he had finally come to see me," Robert said.

My prayers now are that God would use this breakthrough as an opportunity to reunite Robert with the rest of his family. I want Robert to see God work one more miracle. I want Robert to see his family come together again before he dies.

I also want Robert to surrender his life, and to give his heart, to the God who loves him more than life itself. I want him to know the same Jesus who moved time and space and shifted the stars to make a way for an estranged, lost son to be reunited with a dying father on Saturday.

Pray with me, if you would, for my friend Robert Higgins. I'm not sure how much longer he will live. Honestly, all I know is that I will be with him until the very end. Now, thankfully, I know that his son will be with him, too.

This miracle, as wonderful as it is, is just the beginning. I'm sure God is not finished with this man's life just yet.

I can't wait to see what God does next.

Thank you for praying.

-kg

UPDATE: ROBERT HIGGINS

Last night I spoke on the phone with his son, Richard. He was very nice on the phone although he did admit that there was some "major drama" between Robert and the rest of the family that is still hanging in the air. Because of this, Richard was not willing to give out his Mom's phone number, or the contact info for his 2 sisters - although he confessed he wasn't even sure where one of his sister's was now.

Richard shared with me that he felt like he had made peace with Robert over whatever it was that took place. He said he sometimes wondered about his Dad, and he did ask me a few questions about how Robert was doing. I only shared with him that Robert was in a wheelchair and that his arm was in a sling. Beyond that I didn't feel like it was time to share any more than this - at least not until the two of them have a chance to talk one-on-one.

Richard said he was ok with me sharing his phone number with Robert. He said he might try to come and see his Dad sometime, too. Although, I did not tell Richard that Robert was in an assisted living facility.

Tonight I plan to drop by and inform Robert that I’ve found his son and offer him the chance to talk to Richard again over the phone.

Please pray that God will use this to bring healing to Robert's family. My concern is that this might only bring up more painful and negative feelings for Robert. Obviously, there is a long way to go for God to bring reconciliation to this family. But, I've seen God work in situations like this in the past and I'll be praying that He can soften hearts and restore relationships in Robert's family.

Of course, a big step for Robert is still his own faith in Christ. He and I are having lunch together on Friday. Pray that he and I might have an opportunity to talk about the Lord and for me to have wisdom as I ask Robert some important questions about his faith.

God is doing a great work in Robert's heart these days. Yesterday when I went to visit him he asked me to tape up his birthday cards on the edge of his tray so that everyone could see them.

His Hospice care nurse, Mona, shared with me last week that when Robert told her about the birthday party he started to cry. She wanted me to know that Robert was very blessed by this simple gesture of affection. So, THANK YOU to everyone who participated in that.

The night of the birthday party, as we were leaving his room, Robert took my hand and with tears in his eyes he said to me, "No one has ever done anything like this for me before." It's astounding to me that someone could live for 78 years without experiencing such a simple act of love, but this seems to be Robert's story.

Robert's favorite song, on one of only 2 CD’s he owns, is Foreigner's "I Want To Know What Love Is". As I spend time listening to him talk about his life, I can understand why this is his favorite song. He really doesn't know what love is and he really does want someone to show him. I'm praying that one day, very soon, he will know who love is and embrace Jesus with all of his heart.

Thanks for keeping Robert in your prayers. I’ll provide updates as they come.

Peace,
kg