A Love That's Better Than Sex

In our previous post, I shared a promise that God makes to those who are non-heterosexual, that they would be given a name and a monument that is better than sons or daughters in His Church.

Jesus and Paul affirm that those who are “eunuchs for  the sake of the Kingdom” are partakers of this promise if they remain celibate and devote themselves to the concerns of Christ.

But where does that leave the lonely disciple who longs for physical love?

Whether gay or straight, those who are single and celibate in the Body of Christ must wrestle with a very real need to love and to be loved by others.

Jesus knows this. He already knows what we need before we ask, and so He has a plan to address this need. What Jesus has in mind involves a complete redefinition of family and friendship.

“Who are my mother and sisters and brothers?”, Jesus asks.

Are they not those who love Him and put His words into practice?

In his ekklesia, everyone finds a safe place to be who they are, without shame. In the Body of Christ, everyone finds a friend who will lay down their life for them. In the Church that Jesus builds, everyone discovers a house full of mothers, brothers, and sisters who all embrace them, welcome them, and love them – not only in words, but in action and in truth.

The community of Christ is designed to provide everyone with a family that won’t forsake them; with brothers and sisters who will bear one another’s burdens; with deep friendships that are stronger than death, and better than a wife or husband, or sons or daughters.

In the Temple of the Holy Spirit, the Father has promised that everyone – especially those who are alone – will be cherished, and valued, and profoundly loved.

Granted, not every church fellowship has fully realized this yet.

But when the church fails to do this, everyone suffers. Not only the single and celibate, but those who are married suffer, too. Because everyone in the Body of Christ is intended to be welcomed, and at home, and embraced, and loved.

In the Jewish culture there is a concept of “Shalom” that extends to include everyone in the community. If there is even one person who does not enjoy “shalom” – which means having the food, clothing, shelter, warmth, and love, that every human being requires – then none of us has “shalom”.

In the Body of Christ, we are meant to ensure that everyone in our community is loved. Jesus commanded us to love one another. Paul told us to bear one another's burdens. John told us to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.

If one of us in the Church doesn't have love, then none of us really has it.

"If anyone....sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth." - 1 John 3:17]

This means loving one another as Christ has loved us. It means opening our homes if need be. It means sacrificing our free time. It means sharing our meals, and our hearts, and our money, and anything else that is necessary to meet the needs of everyone in our Church family.

If we don’t live in His love, and experience His love, and share His love freely among those within His Body, how can we call ourselves the children of a God who is love?

-kg


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IMAGE CREDIT: Scott Laumann

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READ MORE?

*NOT A SIN?
*THE NEW SAMARITANS
*OUR MISSED OPPORTUNITY
*BLESSED ARE THE EUNUCHS

Our Missed Opportunity

By arguing with gay people about the validity of their love, we've missed the opportunity to talk with them about the reality of Christ's love.

Worse yet, we’ve also lost our chance to demonstrate the love of Jesus to them, and this is something that many of them are most desperate to experience.

What Jesus commanded of us, and what Jesus expects of us, is that we lead with love; and that we love others "as I have loved you" - which was unconditionally and completely.

Instead, we’ve decided that “love” is about telling people the truth. Therefore, by telling people that they are horrible sinners who are destined for an eternal suffering in hell, we are “loving” them and therefore we are fulfilling Jesus’ command to “love others”.

The problem with that is – it’s not love, it’s pride. Arrogance and judgment, maybe, but not love.

When Jesus gave us these commands to love others and to put others first, his examples included showing compassion to our enemies, spending our money to take care of their needs, healing their wounds, transporting them at our personal expense, and treating them the way we would like to be treated.

Here’s a simple test we can use to determine if we’re fulfilling Jesus’ command to be known by our love:

If people feel loved, then you are loving them.

If people feel hated, hurt and judged, you are not loving them.


I feel like we’ve been trying to make this Gay Marriage debate about them, when it’s really about us.

What I mean is, we’ve focused so much on how “wrong” they are – and how “right” we are – that we’ve failed to stop and see all the ways we are wrong.

Instead of stopping to ask ourselves what our mission to this culture really is, we’ve continued onward in a frenzy, desperate for the world to hurry up and open their eyes and see how right we are.

And in our impassioned ranting all they can see is how angry, and petty, and dismissive, and condescending, and unloving we are.

Put another way, all we have shown them is just how unlike Jesus we are.

Or, more tragically, we have told them that we represent Jesus, and then we have done what he would never have done; We have rejected them. We have condemned them. We have given them no hope.

The other day I read a blog post by a friend of mine from High School. He’s not a Christian. He’s also gay.

As I attempted to read this blog out loud to Wendy, in our kitchen, I just broke down into tears. His words sliced into my heart and ripped into my soul.

Here’s just a sample of what he shared:

“Apparently, this guy died on a cross so that I wouldn't be able to get married. I don't know how he knew that it would be an issue, over 2,000 years later, but he did it.

[Of course] he never said anything like that in the Bible, if you believe in that sort of thing. I personally don't think this guy died for [that]. I think he died because he tried to show that his God was not what everyone else was saying he was. I think he died because churches had become places of profit, rather than worship.

I think, if I believe the Bible, that he hung out with a whore and 12 other guys who went fishing a lot. I don't think he'd have trouble with guys who like guys.

I'm not even dating anyone, so what do I care? I care, because the oppressive energy behind this religious fervor is disheartening. When I am told that I cannot get married, I'm told I cannot be loved. To say to me that I may not get married is to say to me that I am sentenced to die alone.

I have a very dear cousin who has said to me, that God does not and will not honor my marriage. That I may not get married. I don't know if he realizes that he has said to me; that I may not express my love of someone else; that if I may not reach the destination of marriage, why bother making the trip?

Why bother trying to find someone that you can't marry? And if you're not married, you are living in sin. If you express physical love with someone you are not married to, you are sinning.

God hates sin. God hates you. God meant for you to be alone; [to] die alone.

Certainly, I don't believe any of those things are true, but my cousin does. He chooses to believe that God does not want me to be with someone.

Or maybe, somewhere in the back of my mind I do believe it. Maybe that's why I've gone this long without finding someone. Maybe I am alone because a while back, someone who is so close to me told me that I am unworthy of love.”
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I know that reading all that may evoke a variety of thoughts and emotions in your heart.

You may be tempted to argue that my friend is arguing with God’s Word. You may be tempted to call him a sinner and point out how depraved his lifestyle is, according to a few verses in the Bible.

But, for a moment, I hope you can understand the value of hearing someone on the other side of this conversation reflecting back to us what we sound like.

Receive this as a gift from God to you. Understand that, in our pursuit of ultimate “rightness” we have been sending a non-Christian person messages like:

“God hates you.”

“You are unworthy of love.”

“You’ve been sentenced to die alone”.

It doesn’t really matter if we’ve intended to send those messages. Those are the messages they have received from us.

To me, the Christian church has missed the mark when it comes to loving the gay community.

Does anyone know another word for “missing the mark”?

Oh yeah, I think it was the word “sin”.

We can do better.

If we can set aside our need to be right and start getting on our knees to wash feet, and humble ourselves just a little, we just might convince people that God’s love is real, and that Jesus really does love them, and that they are not only worthy of love, they are at the center of His heart and dearly treasured by Him – and by us.

In fact, until they are loved and treasured by us, I’m not sure anyone will ever believe that they are loved and treasured by God.

“We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us.” [2 Cor. 5:20]

-kg

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READ MORE?
*NOT A SIN?
*THE NEW SAMARITANS
*BLESSED ARE THE EUNUCHS
*A LOVE THAT'S BETTER THAN SEX

UNCONDITIONAL

On Friday, June 26, 2015, the Supreme Court of the United States made a landmark decision regarding the definition of marriage for the entire nation.

What should we do about that?

Well, we could start by following Jesus. We could go out into all the world (not just this nation) and start to preach the Gospel of the Kingdom to everyone. We could begin to teach people to obey everything that Jesus commanded. We could participate and collaborate with the Holy Spirit as He transforms people into the image of Christ. That's our job and our mission as Christians – regardless of what our Government does.

How should we treat LGBT individuals?

We should love them.

We should open our hearts, and our homes, and, yes, even our churches, to embrace them and welcome them and love them.

Forget the politics. Let the politicians do what politicians do, but please, let the Body of Christ do what She is called - and commanded - to do.

If we're successful in our endeavor, it won't matter what laws they pass.

Besides, if Christians were as concerned with loving everyone as they are with "being right" the whole world would have known Jesus' love by now.

It’s time to get our eyes on Jesus, and to start doing what he told us to do, and begin loving with the kind of extravagant love he expects us to be known for.

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another." - Jesus (John 13:34)

Think about that verse for a moment. "As I have loved you," Jesus says, "so you must love one another." 

How has Jesus loved you? Did He love you because you did something first? Or did Jesus love you as you were - unconditionally?

Unconditional love is what brought us here. Unconditional love is what transforms us. Unconditional love is what Jesus pours out on us, and it's what we are commanded to pour out on everyone else.

What does "Unconditional" mean to you?

Love like that and I think we'll not only please our Father in Heaven, but we'll be demonstrating that we love our Lord Jesus. 

"If you love me, you will obey what I command." - Jesus (John 14:15)

"You are my friends if you do what I command"- Jesus (John 15:14)

"Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me." - Jesus (John 14:21)

"If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching." - Jesus (John 14:23)

"He who does not love me will not obey my teaching." - Jesus (John 14:24)

"If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love.." - Jesus (John 15:10)

  

BONUS: 

For those of you who are fearful that America is falling away from previously held Biblical values, please remember that our faith was born under cruel, anti-Christian Roman Emperors who tortured and killed the followers of Jesus for sport. If America ever gets that bad (and I doubt that it ever will) we'll still be ok as long as we continue to follow Jesus and obey Him.

Let’s keep our eyes on Jesus and continue to seek first the Kingdom of God. We are not called to become entangled in the affairs of this world. We are called to love people as Jesus loves them and to demonstrate the transformative power of the Gospel of Jesus to the world around us.

And maybe, who knows, maybe in the process we might discover that we are the ones who are just as much in need of His transformative love and grace as anyone else in this world.

Amen?

-kg

The Missing Peace?

I know a great many Christians today who are full of anguish and frustration as they survey what's occuring in our world today.

A Democrat has been elected president of the United States. Gay marriage has been legalized and currently pending review by the Supreme Court in California. Israel has retaliated against Palestine with a devastating military response leaving hundreds dead in Gaza.

As a result I hear these Christians express varying degrees of emotion. Some cheer when they hear that Israel has blown up entire city blocks in response to rocket attacks by Hamas. Some wring their hands in anguish over Obama in fear that he will turn our nation into an Islamic state and introduce a socialistic government. Others wag their heads over the gay marriage issue and say, "Please Lord, just come back soon and judge this Nation and take me to heaven."

These responses are quite far away from what the Word of God instructs.

When I read Romans, chapter 9, starting in verse 2, I hear the heart of Paul the Apostle as he looks upon a nation that has turned its back on God and rejected His Gospel and their Messiah. He does not call for God to come down and judge them and to take him home to Glory. Intead, his prayer is the exact polar opposite. He says:

"I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart. For I could wish that I myself were cursed and cut off from Christ for the sake of my brothers, those of my own race, the people of Israel. Theirs is the adoption as sons; theirs the divine glory, the covenants, the receiving of the law, the temple worship and the promises. Theirs are the patriarchs, and from them is traced the human ancestry of Christ, who is God over all, forever praised! Amen." - Romans 9:2-5

Paul actually desires for God to judge himself so that his Nation might be saved. He doesn't ask God to save himself and judge those hard-hearted sinners. He is so filled with love and compassion for these hateful, stubborn people that he is willing in his heart to loose his own eternal salvation in order to see them come to Christ.

Where are the Christian leaders of today who are expressing a similar heart for the lost? Why are Christian TV and Radio stations filled with the refrain "Come soon Lord and judge this evil Nation and take your Bride home to be with you."?

It's no secret that God's people have forgotten to be known for their love. It's no secret that the Church in America is known more for what she is against that what she is for.

Our hope is in God alone. He is still in control of time and history. The Gospel of the Kingdom is our salvation.

God will not hold the sinners accountable for the judgment our nation receives. He will hold us responsible.

"If my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land." - 2 Chronicles 7:14

Our response to the distress in our world is to humble ourselves and pray and confess our own sins to God and cry out for people to be healed and saved - not judged and condemned.

In I John 2:6 it says, "Whoever claims to be in Him must walk as Jesus did."

This means that we, as representatives of God's Kingdom and as followers of Christ, are called to respond as Jesus would respond.

We are called to be peaceful and peace loving. Why are there no Christian churches, schools or universities teaching courses in peace making? Why isn't this one of our primary values? "Blessed are the peace makers for they will be called the sons of God" - Jesus, (Matthew 5:9)

As those who walk as Jesus did we are called to be forgiving. Jesus forgave those who were in the act of murdering him saying "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." Most of us have never had to forgive someone for attempted murder, and yet we find forgiving those who have insulted us or hurt our feelings difficult, even though we have freely received forgiveness for our sins - sins which put Christ on the cross in our place.

We are called to humble ourselves as Jesus did. "Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking on the very nature of a servant..." - Phil 2:6-7

We are called to be like Jesus and to serve those around us in love. Jesus wrapped a towel around His waist and took on the role of a slave and washed the feet of His disciples. Then he instruced them, and us, to do the same:

"Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another's feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you....Now that you know these things you will be blessed if you do them." - John 13:14-17

We are also called to touch the poor and the needy around us. Jesus told us that whatever we did for the least of these was the same as doing it to Him. (See Matthew 25:35-46)

When it comes to people suffering in war, whether at the hands of Israel, or America, or anyone, our response as followers of Christ should be to weep and to pray for peace. We are called by our Lord and Savior to be peace makers, not war mongers. Peace is our goal. Reconciliation is our ministry.

When it comes to issues like Gay Marriage, let us remember that we're all sinners and we all need the same Jesus and the same mercy and grace.

Let us be dispensers of grace, mercy and love, not hate, judgment and bitterness. God is still in control and our calling is still to be people who are filled with the radical love of God.

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NOTE: This article originally appeared on the Subversive Underground Newsletter.